U Not Gonna Like This

A post from The Inferno:

Only Women Can Stop False Allegations of Rape


Male Samizdat has put together a nice list linked below in response to this feminist garbage.

Only Women Can Stop False Rape Accusations (Male Samizdat)

If you haven't seen it and don't want to waste your time, the feminists that spread around their ridiculous list are trying to imply that many men really do think it's okay to rape a woman if she's drunk, going for a jog, or watching TV. Many (if not all) of the reasons these women think men use to justify rape are pretty stupid.

I like Male Samizdat's parody of the feminist list since it shows how ridiculous it is while also pointing out the dirty secret of false accusations. However, I think we can make a better list (although a poorer parody) using reasons that women actually use to justify a false accusation of rape.

Without further ado, here is my list.

• If you have sex with a guy and regret it the next day, don't falsely accuse him of rape.
  
• If your husband catches you having sex with another man, don't falsely accuse your lover of rape.
  
• If you get into a bar fight and don't want to tell the judge during custody hearings where the bruises really came from, don't falsely accuse a man of rape.
  
• If you have sex with a guy and he tells his friends about it, don't falsely accuse him of rape to protect your reputation.
  
• If you're pissed off at the cop that arrested you or gave you a ticket, don't falsely accuse him of rape.
  
• If your boyfriend breaks up with you, don't falsely accuse him of rape.
  
• If you feel deprived of attention, don't falsely accuse a man of rape.
  
• If you are a hired as a stripper for some Duke lacrosse players from wealthy families, don't falsely accuse them of rape to try to get money out of them.
  
• If you want to have an abortion without people thinking you're an immoral baby-killer, don't falsely claim the baby is the product of rape.
  
• If a man rejects your sexual advances, don't falsely accuse him of rape.
  
• If one of your friends sees you having sex with a random guy at a party, don't falsely accuse him of rape just so your friends won't think you're a slut.
  
• If you are having an affair while your husband is overseas and are afraid you might be pregnant, don't falsely accuse a man of rape to hide your infidelity.
  
• If your boyfriend is cheating on you, don't falsely accuse him of rape.
  
• If you have sex with every guy in a fraternity while they video tape it and realize it was a bad idea the next day, don't falsely accuse them of rape.
  
• If you think you were infected with a sexually transmitted disease by your boyfriend, don't falsely accuse him or some other man of rape.
  
• If you are a teacher and have sex with one of your students in school, don't falsely accuse him of rape to avoid losing your job.
  
• If you are a pregnant teenager and don't want your parents to know you are sexually active, don't falsely accuse a man of rape.
  
• If you make some poor decisions, take responsibility. Don't falsely accuse a man of rape. The above scenarios are all based on real incidents in which a man was falsely accused of rape.
  
• A 1994 study conducted by Dr. Eugene Kanin concluded that at least 41% of rape allegations in the studied area were false. The actual numbers are probably much higher since allegations were only counted as false if the accuser recanted, even after being told that recanting will result in charges for filing a false police report. Cases where the alleged victim decided to drop the charges were not counted as false accusations.